Melting Through the Buzz to Rest in the Divine, Not the Mind
Having experienced the accelerating energy for many years, I know at times it can be fairly excruciating. I don’t know how you’ve been experiencing it, but people are cracking: school shootings, sex scandals, brutal cases of road rage, fear about money, relationships exploding as hidden agendas come roaring to the surface with dramatic repercussions. Personally I have had periods where I felt as though I were encased in a deep-sea diving suit with water filling it to the top, then subsiding so I could breathe a little, then filling up and subsiding, again and again, as waves of emotion overwhelmed me; and it wasn’t all MY emotion! It’s getting harder to discriminate who owns the emotions in the soup we’re swimming in.
I’ve heard varying explanations about why the energy inside our bodies and in the physical world is oscillating so fast: astrological transits and eclipses, sunspots, esoteric alignments. I don’t know what it is, but it’s real. One day my energy is screwed up to a high pitch and if I’m not super-centered, my mind races ahead, I get frustrated, irritated, and panic can take over. Then, it calms and I come back to an experience of being and all that “being” brings: peace, simple pleasures, creative desires, willingness to love anything. Then, vroom, vroom, vroom! Off we go again! It’s as though there is a contest going on between the ego-mind and the being or divine-mind part of myself. If I tune in to the nuances of either of those states, I know which one I like. It’s just remembering to choose the one I prefer and staying in it as the new reality. During one of the intense waves, I wrote this:
Every few days I feel semi-flattened by something. . .it’s not the world, but an internal energy, a strange state of consciousness. It’s like I’m walking through an energy wall of electrified particles and my own particles are trying to quickly adapt to a radioactive state but the pressure is too great. My particles no longer oscillate; they scream. I take my mind in there, and with its accustomed neat order, it is electrocuted. It wants to leap away. It spreads out without focus and turns grayish mauve. There are no defenses. Then the chaos in the world affects me deeply, the noises are louder, the people abrasive, the harmony so distant. And, oddly, in this flatness of feeling there is no rest. Welling up around every particle is a sad, too-tender syrup of exhaustion.
Am I resting in the Mind, or in the Divine? Is the Mind my environment, my room, my air? But stop! I can’t use Mind to escape Mind. Is surrender a technique I must learn? I can’t take another “how” right now. Will puts me to sleep. Linear thinking makes me want to go unconscious.
Instead, I imagine I’m receiving an injection of a sparkly radioactive serum of higher Love spreading out and medicating me back into the Divine. I need to let it work its way through, not interfering with human doubt and aggravation. Just tune to the vibration of the serum; stay in that, see it, feel it, everywhere inside.
It takes over my Mind and there is profound relief, and after that is the vision of perfection everywhere, and after that there is meeting my real self, then meeting myself in each one, then there is radiating ease about problems, laughing at separation and difficulty. I know the new me is here, waiting, so patient.
I choose the vibration in the energy wall and fall in wholeheartedly, entering the sparkly light. It supports me! It communicates to my particles effortlessly; particles know other particles, adapt their resonances so easily. As my particles adjust, I feel the one unified field of high vibration filled with gazillions of resonating particles. My particle orbits become smaller. As I stay in that frequency, the orbits of the subatomic particles become smaller and smaller and finally disappear altogether. I am left simply BEING in a totally continuous, transparent energy of Love. No more particles, no more vibration, no more duality. All is complete and incredibly peaceful. I wonder if I have just made a quantum leap, gone with the particles out of form into another dimension where they aren’t energy anymore, but pure awareness.If you’re being challenged by the same sort of energy-emotion-mind intensifications, know that you are probably facing some of the core fears and oldest limiting behavior habits you have. These are simply low-frequency interferences that you, the soul, are trying to clear. Yet perhaps even more frightening than that is the prospect of becoming your true self, the soul in the body, the embodied personality. Your ego-mind does not want to relinquish control so it can make it seem that “becoming radioactive” is highly dangerous. We have to remember that everything is evolutionary and the heightening energy is conscious, and it does know what it’s doing.
Here are some things to keep in mind:
• Be on alert for fatalistic, limiting declarations in your conversations or inner self-talk that feed limitation or victim consciousness; stop them midstream when you hear yourself uttering them. Be spacious instead for a moment until a healthier thought arises from your core. Break the old habit of indulging in feeling that you’re flawed, may be rejected, or that you can feel hurt because others don’t feel loved. Watch the underlying anxiety: that you must take away their pain or reject them first to avoid feeling pain yourself.
• Practice observing others indulging in pain. Let them do it; without the pressure to change them, you may discover a simple way to help them through the stuckness instead of taking it from them — if you want to. You can offer assistance to others on a case-by-case basis, because you truly love doing it. First, though, look to clear the same issue (perhaps in a different area of life) from yourself.
• Recognize moments when you flip into accusing, judging, or blaming yourself or others. Suspend immediately and go soft and blank for a moment until the pause lets you think more responsibly about what’s best to do. What really needs to be communicated? Form some words that speak truth without projection.
• When you visit past memories: Breath into them, then exhale back into the present moment immediately, letting your mind go soft, as though you don’t really know what any of it means. Let all the experiences just BE. Do these experiences belong only to you? Or do they belong to a polarized field of consciousness and energy that many people dip into and personalize in their own way?
Recognize the repeating stories. What do you get out of repeating them?
Let meaning come when (or if) it wants to. Don’t overlay a meaning just because your mind is nervous and wants closure or definition.
• Be honest, no justifications, excuses, or side-stepping.
• Contemplate what it really means to forgive, to repent, to receive grace, to give grace, to let things be the way they are, knowing everything is evolving in its own way.
• When you remember, soften your heart, chest, and back; bring oxygen into your cells; stretch out where your body physically contracts; work the tight spots.
• Know that other people can see your excellence and true nature. You don’t have to apologize or over-represent your good traits to compensate for things you think are bad. When you’re quiet and peaceful, your true self radiates widely.
• Your "boundaries" will form naturally when you are truthful about what works for you to be your fullest self. By telling people what works for you, you are not being egotistical or hurting them, but helping them feel comfortable, because they then know how to act around you and that relieves tension for them. Do what it takes to not confuse people about your desires.
• Cultivate a cheerful, progressively enthusiastic attitude toward what’s possible — how problems can be solved magically in a win-win way even though you can’t think of the solution in the moment. Everything you’ve ever wanted or been interested in (that you gave up or put on the back burner) can be included in your present reality, if you allow it. All sorts of combinations are possible, and it’s possible to change it all and start again.
• Commit to the discovery of the present moment, the fresh awareness that is empowered to emerge through this opening that is your consciousness in your body in the here, in the now. Simply notice what your soul is observing. What are you bringing into your consciousness? Then engage fully with it. Learn from it, create with it.
• Let yourself enjoy feeling loved, the way a child does. You don’t owe the person loving you anything, you’re like a dog that enjoys being petted. Your pleasure and feeling of safety, the light in your eyes, your smile, is reward enough for the person doing the loving.
Remember that we are all helping each other, that at a deep level — as souls— we do know what we’re doing, we do have the guidance to return to our naturally enlightened state and wake up from the dreams we’re all so busily embroiled in. We can’t jump out of the frying pan, or out of the fire, since there is nothing now BUT the purifying fire, which is the diamond light of the soul. We’re burning away what’s blinding us to our true state. Our particles know how to adapt their frequency almost instantly when we get our dominating left brain out of the way. And what seems so threatening and unfamiliar is really the most familiar, comfortable, natural state to the soul. This is the state we rest in, and out of which all our creations arise and fall back into, like the tide, like the waves on the beach.
Copyright by Penney Peirce, 2015